Words from the past

When I got home from work tonight I started packing up a little and getting a few boxes ready for Justin to take back to Dallas when he goes back after this weekend. While I was going through a huge stack f papers I came across 3 opened manilla envelopes addressed to me. I immediately recognized them from our high school youth group retreats. Every year at retreat (usually around January) our youth minister, Rick, would ask us to write a letter to ourselves/God, and then to 3 people at the retreat. The letters were supposed to be encouraging words or tell something you admired about that person. We would then seal them up and turn them in and he would gather all the letters that had been written to you and mail them after like 8 months. By then you forget you ever wrote any letters so when they come its like Christmas day. Anyway, I had 3 years worth of letters and I started to go through them year by year. Some of them were sweet, some casual, some even brought tears to my eyes. Some brought up happy times and some reminded me of some very painful times. But what made me so happy and emotional was to remind myself that others see good in me. That is something that sometimes comes difficult for me, to believe the good that others have to say about me. After reading I thought, "do they really see all that?", or, "what made me stand out to them?" And an even harder question, "What would people see in me now?"

What a beautiful reminder to be an example of God's love to the people I am not even aware are watching me. Even in my most immature days, when I thought no one was watching, when I didnt make the bet decisions, God used me to bless someone's day or perhaps someone's life. And I for sure was blessed by many in that group along the way...thank God for the experiences in the Westover youth group.

Sewing fun and a family update

Alright, so its no secret that I am not the most domestic woman out there. However, I want to improve in that area and am doing so by trying to learn to sew. I can sew a straight line, no problem. That sums up piecing together a quilt top. But the question now is, can I make a simple skirt that looks any good? I found a blogspot that I have enjoyed reading called freshlypicked.blogspot.com and I encourgae you to check it out. This lady is super crafty but her stuff looks very professional too. I made the skirt from her 'elastic skirt, mama edition' tutorial and it turned out just the way it was supposed to but it was VERY unflattering on me...even though it looked darling on her in the picture. SO, with that experiment in the works, it got me very motivated to try and really sew a skirt worth wearing. I will post my progress and I would love it if any of you had any suggestions/patterns/tips/easy-to-sew ideas. Ill be back, hopefully with a finished product!

Update on the family:
Just a quick update on my family...my dad just went in for an angiogram where they shoot dye into his heart area and find any blockages. He had 2 stints put in and it went smoothly. They are going to go in a little later to check on another area but thank the Lord they could fix the problem happening now. My mom was lucky to have her sister, my aunt Kerry, come down and hang out in the hospital with her. She said dad had many visitors, mostly of which was family. We are so blessed and God is so good.

Justin is finishing up training at his new job and will start next week on the phones by himself. He seems to be adjusted to the Dallas area and says there are many new food joints we will have to try. I love finding new places that are unique to the area. We got a little apartment there so me and Dixie dog are going to come visit this coming weekend and stay awhile (its my Spring Break). I have an interview on Tuesday and am very eager to see what the potential job could entail. Prayers for peace regarding finding a job would be greatly appreciated. Even if it doesnt work out in my favor, it gives me hope that there might be a place out there for me in the job world. God will use me wherever I end up. Alright...Ill be back with more in a bit!

It baffles me

Being considered an adult is a tricky thing. Starting in junior high, then high school, and then later in college we are told what will be expected of us when we are an adult. We are told that we will be expected to be professional, respectful, responsible, and even admirable. We are told that all of these qualities will help us survive in the dreaded 'real world' and that we, at that moment, have no idea what that really entails. I have been in the 'real world' for about 2, 2 1/2, years now and am convinced that all of that was a load of melarky. I shouldnt say all of it was garbage, the part about what is expected of us seems to ring true. But the part I cant seem to place my finger on is why all those traits are expected when those are not the qualities you encounter when stepping foot into the 'real world'. I am amazed at the way the so called adults around me pretend they exemplify those 'adult qualities' when their behavior is, quite frankly, childish. And by childish I mean like an ornery five year old as well as a pre-teen who hasnt developed that content-censor.  Its almost as if having the adult status disquises childish behavior, as if such behavior is justified because of a greater knowledge of a situation. Of course these situations, according to 'adults', could never be understood by the tiny mind of a high school or college student. That was sarcasm if you didnt catch it.

I might be rambling so let me back up. I met my husband when I was 12 and knew I wanted to marry him when I was 17. The only older people around me that took that relationship seriously were our parents and youth ministers (a teacher or two are included in this group). Many other older people straight out told us we were too young to know anything. An article was printed up in our school newspaper by a teacher further proclaiming this. I think these types of instances separate the real adults from the so-called-adults. Which by the way my brother and his wife, my sister-in-laws brother and his wife, my best friend and her husband, and many couples before our graduating class found each other at 17 or younger and are living happily ever after. Kiss that so-called-adults.

Ive been a waitress for almost 3 years and have learned more about people than I ever thought possible. I have encountered these real adults and the so-called-adults when they come in to dine at my restaurant. Some of the worst customers I have ever served were dressed in suits on business lunches/dinners. Let me state that not all business people that come in act childish but generally speaking, you can call it when they walk through the door. They snap at you, use condescending tones with phrases like, "Ummm, yyeeeaaaa, you forgot my straw", or "uuummmm ma'am...ma'am, arent you gunna get our food" as if I can make the food cook faster. They answer their cell phone while you're in midsentence answering one of their questions. These are the people that educate us young stupid people that we are to be professional, respectful, responsible, and admirable. And just for future reference, almost all of the servers I work with have a degree, are working on a masters, or are in the middle of the bachelor's degree. We are not stupid because just because we aren't too arrogant to work a job like this. Just letting you know...all of you so-called-adults.

All of this to say, be an adult you so-called-adults. Stop acting like you're professional, respectful, responsible, or admirable just because of your position in life. A position doesn't make you an adult. Age doesn't make you an adult either for that matter.

It all just baffles me.